Whenever there’s a news story about a teenager in trouble, I always wonder if I knew that kid. Was that a former student of mine? Did they go to my school? Were they ever a junior high student of ours?

My first year of teaching, I had a student who was always in the deans office. He was really rude and very disrespectful. I remember talking to the dean’s secretary about him and she just shook her head and said, "He’s one you know isn’t going to make it." I knew she meant that he wouldn't graduate high school and would likely wind up in jail. Sure enough, a year later he turned up murdered. His family insists that he was a good kid and wasn’t involved in gang activity, but I that's not what I knew of him.

This summer, an elderly couple that attends my church was found murdered in their home. I didn’t know them, but the murder was very disturbing to our whole church and community. When they finally caught the suspects in November, we heard that they were teenagers and I immediately commented to Josh that I wondered if I knew them. They were slow to release the names - and to be honest, I've cut out a lot of local news from my life - but this morning I finally heard the suspect's names. One of the murderers was a student of mine just last year. I had very few problems with him. He mostly kept to himself and was always kind and respectful to me. Granted, he is the same student who attacked another student with a text book in my room, but when I ran into him at Food Maxx, he was polite and eager to tell me how he was improving. He wanted to tell me how he was doing at his new continuation school. He wanted me to meet his mentor who was with him.

I’m so sad. I thought this student was trying to change his life. I thought he was trying to do better. My heart breaks that he made such a devastating choice. I'm considering writing him a letter in jail to try to encourage him in some way, but what would I say? I've never known someone involved in such a heinous crime before.